The MarySue Academy
by icee2764
Summary: Lollipop Blueberry Curtis is a Mary-Sue in training, and she wants to be the best.  But if her brothers find out, it could very well be the death of her.  And some secrets weren't meant to stay secrets...


CHAPTER 1

Okay, so this is my fanfic on here, but not the first one I've ever written. This story is meant to be stupid, because it's a parody, but I am working on another non-humorous story, which I'm actually better at writing those. And please tell me if you think it's funny or not, because I tried my best. Onward!

_xxxXxxx_

Lollipop Curtis didn't even flinch as a bright light was shone into her eyeball. She was too dang tuff for that. The doctor flipped the switch of the tiny flashlight off, tucking it into one of her pockets. She pulled a swiveling chair from a desk and took a seat, facing Lollipop Curtis. "So you're another sister, eh?" the doctor, who's name was Doctor Sue, asked.

Lollipop Curtis nodded proudly. "I hope you're not one of the ten year olds... They're annoying."

The Curtis sister shook her head, for some reason, giggling. "Oh, no! I'm sixteen going on seventeen... Sodapop's twin!"

Doctor Sue smiled brightly (probably having a crush on the middle Curtis brother despite the fact that he was a teenager and she was well in her thirties), and scribbled something on her notepad. Lollipop was Soda's twin, alright... Except she was just so much cuter (if that's even possible). Now, since she is a Mary Sue in training, and it's only about the fourth paragraph of the story, it's time to describe every little detail about her. The scientific name for this method is _purple prosing. _

To start off, Lollipop had blonde hair, just like her twin. While it would've been fine and dandy if her hair was _just blonde, _Lollipop is too spectacular for that. Her hair had _natural _streaks of orange gold, chocolate brown, and cherry red. It was long, sleek, and shiny, and traveled all the way down her back. She had a heart-shaped face full of beautiful charm- perfectly arched eyebrows, long black lashes (even though her hair was blonde), an adorable button nose, full pink lips, and straight white teeth, even though there were probably no good dentists in the 60s, if any at all. I'm really not sure. I mean, have _you _ever watched a movie that took place in the 60s where there was a dentist scene? I sure haven't. But, hey, what do I know? Anyway, Lollipop's eyes were her most dazzling feature. Because Ponyboy had green eyes, and Soda had brown, and Darry had blue, that only left one color for her... Purple! Yes, she had purple eyes, clear as a violet purple Crayola crayon.

All those other greaser girls needed makeup to look good, but not Lollipop. Nup, she was too stunningly gorgeous as it was. She never touched an ounce of makeup. She was so slim that she looked anorexic... She wasn't of course. That would be a flaw, and she had none of those. Despite this, she had curves in all the right places. Her skin was smooth and tanned a light gold. She had nice, long legs... Not to mention, she had the most glamorous and so-not-60s wardrobe any girl had, even though she is supposedly freaking poor.

"Okay, time to take out our checklist," Doctor Sue said cheerfully.

Lollipop snapped out of her thoughts. "Wait, what? Sorry, I forgot what we were talking about somewhere in those two over sized paragraphs of description."

The doctor guffawed, which was a bit odd, and flipped a few pages on her notepad. "Okay, let's see..." Doctor Sue hummed to herself. "Stunningly beautiful, check. Unusual colored hair and eyes, check. Modern clothes..." She looked over Lollipop's short shorts, red draping top, and red, jeweled converse. "Check. And according to your fake birth certificate, you have a very unique and original name."

"Yup," Lollipop replied. "My dad was an original person... I gotta brother named Sodapop!"

"Yes, yes. I know," she nods. She closes her notepad and settles it in her lap. "One last thing before you go. What are you like, Miss Lollipop Curtis?"

"Well that's easy," she chirped, flashing one of her signature smiles. Yes, she has a _signature smile. _Just like her twin brother seems to have. "I'm wild and reckless and understanding like Soda, and hotter too. I'm smart and sensitive like Pony, except I use my head less than him, making Darry love me even more. Speaking of Darry, I have his strength and determination."

Doctor Sue nodded and approving nod, and smiled. "You're good... Go get 'em, tiger." She patted Lollipop on the back, and she slid off the check up table, excitedly dashing through the door and down the street to the Curtis residence.

_xxxXxxx_

"Boy's, I'm _ho-ome!" _Lollipop singsonged, busting the door open.

Ponyboy diverted his attention from his book for a second. Lollipop shook her head, chuckling good-naturedly. That was her silly little brother. All he did was read, apparently. "Who the hell are you?" he asked, more curious than hostile.

"Oh, Pony," she giggled. "How silly of you, forgetting your own sister!" Ponyboy attempted to cock one eyebrow, but failed. "You know, Lollipop Blueberry Curtis? I'm Soda's twin!"

His green eyes lit up with recognition as he jumped from the sofa to embrace his sister. The one he forgot to mention in his essay. "Lollipop, I missed you so much!" he cried, his voice muffled by her sweater. He pulled away, eyes wide. "We have to tell our brothers! SODA! DARRY! OUR DEARLY BELOVED SISTER IS BACK HOME WHERE SHE BELONGS AND I HOPE SHE'S HERE TO STAY THIS TIME BUT WHO KNOWS? SHE COULD RUN OFF AGAIN BUT NO WORRIES! SHE WILL ALWAYS COME BACK TO US BECAUSE WE'RE HER FAMILY AND THIS IS WHERE SHE BELONGS AND FOREVER WILL LIKE I JUST SAID ABOUT A SENTENCE AGO AND NOW SOUNDS VERY REPETITIVE AND LIKE A RUN-ON SENTENCE AND I GOTTA PEE!"

Sodapop poked his head out from his bedroom. "She isn't one of the ten year olds, right?"

"Nope, she's your twin!" Ponyboy exclaimed.

Without further ado, Soda smiles that goofy smile of his and rushes towards Lollipop, picking her up and twirling her in the air as she giggled. "Don't you ever leave us again, Lolli! I was just about to attempt some twisted form of suicide I missed you so much!"

"Lollipop's home?" Darry called from the kitchen, even though Ponyboy had just given a huge speach, clearly stating that she was. Darry walks out to the living room, and when he sees her, tears of joy spring to his eyes and he snatches her from Soda, nearly squeezing the life out of her in his bear hug. "Dear God, Lollipop! Are you okay? We've been worried sick about ya!"

"I'm fine, Darry," she assured him.

Darry continues to weep, and Soda and Pony begin to get a little teary as well. Hell, even Lollipop was starting to cry, though she still looked beautiful doing so. "I thought we lost you like we did Mom and Dad," he choked, holding her closer to him. Then he shriveled, like a piece of paper in the pouring rain, to the ground, in a pitiful ball, his body racking with sobs, a giant green snot bubble in his nose. Normally Lollipop would be repulsed, but this was just so goddamn touching that she let it slide. She was a good person, after all.

Gripping onto her feet for dear life, Darry buried his face into the carpet, while she looked down at him with a sympathetic look in her amethyst eyes. "How could you do this to us, Lolli? You never use your head... You use it less than Pony..."

"Hey!" Ponyboy squeeked indignantly.

"I... I'm so sorry, Darry," Lollipop murmered, crouching to the floor beside Darry. "I promise you, I will never dissapear for a half hour ever again."

Darry's ice blue eyes met hers, and he gave her a relieved grin. Then, all the Curtises took part in one of those famous Curtis hugs.

_xxxXxxx_

"LOLLIPOP! TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL!" She awoke to Soda jumping literally off the walls and screaming. This wasn't even srtange to her... He was just a ball of energy, even at 6:30. Though, how he got his super-spidy powers was beyond her.

She sat up in bed, not in the least bit grumpy or annoyed. She was just Little Miss Frikkin' Sunshine. Out of the blue she says, "Soda, why can't I drop out of school like you?"

Soda grins and drops from the ceiling, patting her head. "Because, Lolli... I'm dumb. And you're so smart and brainy. Darry's real proud of ya. More proud than he is of Ponyboy. And as much as I love Ponyboy, you're my favorite. We have a mental bond, ya know?" She nods. She and Soda are so close, they can send mind messages across the country to each other. "And," he continued, holding up one finger, "as much as Ponyboy worships the ground I walk on, he loves you the most."

Lollipop nods again, smiling that absolutely _ravishing _smile of hers. "Yeah, I know. I better get out of here or I'll be late for school!" She snapped her fingers and she was suddenly out of her pajamas and in casual wear.

"Bye! I love you!" Soda called while she grabbed one of the green pancakes he made (yes, he's only physically capable of making _green _pancakes) and giggles.

_I love you, too, _she sends through her brain to her twin brother, and his message back to her is, _:D._

_xxxXxxx_

Lollipop catches up with Ponyboy and Johnny (who's somehow alive) on their way to school. "OH DEAR GOD!" Ponyboy screams when he sees Lolli run along beside him. She and Johnny give him bewildered looks. Then he begins to cry, because he's sensitive like that.

His sister is immediately rushing to his side, even though the text just stated that she was already beside him. "Ponyboy! What ever is the matter?" she cried out.

Ponyboy buried his eyes into his hands, silent sobs racking through his body. "I can't believe it! I can't believe I didn't wait for you before I left the house!"

"It's okay, Pony," she tried, but he wouldn't have it.

He pulled away from her, tears streaming down his face. "No it's not! After everything you've done for me, I coulda waited two more seconds for you before leaving the house! You had to walk all that way on your own! What if a Soc woulda drove by, huh? They would've killed you and it would've been all MY fault!"

"Guys... Your house is _right _there," Johnny said, pointing to the house that they were standing in front of. He was ignored, because Lollipop and Ponyboy didn't even know he could speak. They spoke to him through sign language, which Johnny was thoroughly confused about.

"Ponyboy," Lollipop chuckled softly. "I'm the toughest girl around. Ain't no Soc that can kill me."

He wiped a tear from his eye, sniffling. "Well I'm still a lousy brother," he pointed out. "And I would have suicidal thoughts at the moment, if it weren't for the fact that today is meatloaf day, and I love meatloaf. Not tomorrow either, because tomorrow is burger day. Come to think of it, that day after that is-"

"C'mon, guys. We're gonna be late for school," Johnny sighed impatiently. In return, Lollipop and Ponyboy made a few swift movements with their hands before walking off, motioning for Johnny to follow. "That family needs help," he muttered under his breath.

_xxxXxxx_

Their first class was science. Lollipop sat in the middle of Ponyboy, Johnny, Steve, and Two-Bit, because they all wanted to sit next to her. On the first day of school they had a fist fight over the two seats on either side of her, causing Steve to break a few ribs, Ponyboy to lose a tooth, Johnny to get a black eye, and Two-Bit to set off a total nuclear explosion.

But sitting on the end today, Ponyboy felt a light tap on his shoulder. Uninterested, he turned to see what the person next to him wanted, and when he saw _her, _his jaw dropped. She was new. He would remember someone who looked like that. She had hair that was blonde... _Just blonde, _and it flowed like the gentle waves of the ocean, shone like the bright rays of the sun. You know what time it is... Say it with me now: _PURPLE PROSING._

Her eyes were the color of moist, fresh cut grass, and they were enthustiastic and lively. Her skin was sun kissed and flawless. She was smiling, too. Her smile was big, and absolutely dazzling. She could've been prettier than his sister, Ponyboy realized. "Y-Yeah?" he stammered.

She cupped a hand around her mouth and whispered, "Wanna hear a secret?"

"Sure."

"Our science teacher..." she nodded to the man, who was probably in his sixties, teaching the class. "Yeah, he raped me."

Ponyboy's eyes widened in shock. "Oh... Um... Wow..."

"I know," she agrees quietly, but she's still smiling cheerfully. "That guy in the back of the class raped me. And that Soc over there raped me. And do you know what the guy next door to me did?"

"He, uh... Raped you?" he guessed, and she nodded sullenly.

"I get raped all the time because of my beauty." She broke out giggling. "It's just like that song! You know, the '_Don't rape me 'cause I'm beautiful. Don't rape me 'cause I'm beautiful.'"_

Ponyboy titled his head a bit to the side. "Isn't it, _'Don't hate me 'cause I'm beautiful?'"_

"I don't know," she shrugged, "But getting raped is like an everyday routine for me... But I choose to be cheerful all the time anyways!"

Ponyboy now looks horrified and a bit disgusted. "Should you really be telling me this?"

She shrugs a second time, got out of her seat, and just like that, _left _the classroom.


End file.
